#Frail Autumn,, #GarageBand,, #Lyrics, #music, #songwriting

Frail Autumn.

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INTERSPERSED WITH SONGS TO BREAK THE MONOTONY OF SELF THOUGHT. THE CIRCLE OF FIVE.

THE CIRCLE ⭕️ OF FIVE.

Hello, hello, hello.

Today I had a minor epiphany. Or as modern speak states, a ‘lightbulb moment’. I was speaking to an old friend today who is a very wise lady. We held conversations about book circles, past experiences of supporting vulnerable others, how we are both currently faring with these older years we are now a significant part of, our situations of both being hermits and seldom seeing others, etc. When I left I was very much dwelling mindfully on the last 30 years I have lived this rural life and its balanced inclusions of gentleness in nature’s aspects and the complete awareness of reality that exists in the professional nursing career undertakings. A ride of extremes in reality. A stressful work related day can be remedied by a drive in a Hippy Vibe VeeDub Bus trundling through the countryside, with a pootling gentle run, back to the safety of home. On wintery dark nights you see the comfort of star spangled skies. On summer nights you see glorious sunsets dropping out West and into the nearby ocean.

CIRCLE ⭕️ ONE……

The penny dropping lightbulb moment was asking myself ‘Why do I not have these opposite conundrums to splendours to balance out the intensity presently?’

Simples….Because I am obsessed with this challenge of GarageBand recordings.

Over the last months since April the focus has been technology, technology and well…….more technology. Learning how to go into arm to arm combat with GarageBand, Apple Mac home recording equipment, amps and microphones, drum machines to link to interfaces and, although not technology, playing various musical instruments way out of my comfort zone.

‘I am a bass player’. Said in a Dr. Who Dalek distorted voice.

The past months have been…..Focus on focus and without removal from the intensity of learning. Even song writing has been done with the purpose of getting it right for the Apple home recording system. Subliminal thoughts of playing for drive, energy and appropriate melody capture. Okay, I have lovely little intimate moments with my acoustic guitar, voice and iPad to capture ideas. But the bigger picture lurks in the background and exists daily in the form of a shadow looking over my shoulder. ‘You ain’t gonna get away with that naive little trembling warbling on GB and turn it into something worth listening to…..are ya!’ Reality can be cruel. Not sometimes, but often. It pokes you in the chest and says ‘Get real’.

CIRCLE ⭕️ TWO.

In the past experiences of songwriting? Back then in the 1970/80s, when we had live gigs and the pressure of a manager who wanted us to become the next Bay City Rollers, Sex Pistols, Duran Duran or Echo and the Bunnymen? We had to think about focusing upon two questions:

‘Which song energies would get a crowd reaction to moving with abandonment at a gig?’

‘What could be a tune that we could write that people take to loving so deeply that it made us famous?’

Man! On reflection that was both heartwarming and shallow. Depending how much you perceive those specific moments. Current considerations are….this is now a ‘Hope to Realise Fun Times’. And…’But will it work on sterile GarageBand?’ Is an open mic night in front of a small audience a better choice than this?

CIRCLE ⭕️ THREE.

GB captures ideas certainly. But gives back nothing that is equivalent to the rawness of a room with energy brought about from yourself and a captivated collective of people who want to take the story home for their own memories. Or, in rehearsal with your band member mates who witness wires all over the floor linked to amplifiers tweaked to the point where they are seriously trying to break the eardrums, drums hammering a beat that sets your innards trembling, guitars producing melodic tunes to die for and vocals that, in competition with those surroundings, ache alarmingly in order to keep in tune with it all and struggle with the effort of breaking through the noise.

CIRCLE ⭕️ FOUR.

Anyways. Back to….the epiphany? Hey Gray! Dodge all this technology focus and duck and dive into opening up a Bandcamp artists app. Distraction. Gentle distraction. So I did. Frail Autumn is official. So now building an artistic page is a fantastic alternative focus. The current GB songs are not fit for purpose to upload. But they will be early next year.

Energy has found new purpose. Why? Because Bandcamp says back to me….’Gray…you’ve nailed your colours to the mast’. You are now committed to building a site that has to be seen as a decent presentation to what you believe in. What do I believe in you may ask. I believe in myself. If you don’t….you give up and crumble. Like dipping your favourite biscuits in a cup of unforgiving hot coffee and they break under the heat and sink to the bottom of the cup. A messy result to hoped for glorious self experience.

My recent project. I know other people believe too. My wise friend I spoke of earlier told me that our mutual friend, who visited me at home a few months back, was very impressed with my songs. And for that simple single one person reaction…I am eternally grateful. But also too? My local family, friends and WP lovelies here are ever supportive. You can’t put a price on that. And, all you guys and girls out there. You can’t put a price on belief in you yourselves and your own positive aims and energies either. If it’s in your soul then own it. I suppose that if we have no belief in ourselves? What’s the point?

Cheers me dears. And so concludes the………..

CIRCLE ⭕️ FIVE.

16 thoughts on “Frail Autumn.”

  1. Nice EP there Gray….welcome to the BC camp….I bought Heaven Up Here back in the day still have it – Side 1 is a cracker Show Of Strength, Over The Wall and With A Hip, wonder I haven’t worn it out (that’s not a song – just a statement)…S

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    1. Cheers Shep. Will check your suggestion of HUH out later today. Getting to grips with BC artist app or internet viewing choice. Not great with either at the moment. Just blank canvas because of no upload of anything other than a little dragon avatar. A bit like when starting here on WP, it will all settle after a bit.

      I do like your suggestion re: EP. The Team 23 were going to put a vinyl Live EP out back in the 1980s. We used the Rolling Stones mobile unit when supporting the band Madness. That was going to be Five songs. Never got to see the light of day as we split up the band. So maybe life does work in Circles. May call the EP The Circle of Five. Pity there are only Four seasons in the year! Could have had a little theme going there. 😊 All the best Shep.

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  2. Oh! This is so lovely, Gray! So restful, easy, and insightful! Yes, of course! Now, after all this GB struggle, you’ve hit upon it! The epiphany. Go figure. Right? Ugh! But then, haha!
    And as a spiral person here, I love your presentation here of the circles.
    Ohh, and I will be listening momentarily after I load a few Bay City Rollers and Duran Duran songs that I had forgotten into my All-Time Favorite YouTube playlist! Thank you for that!
    And I think you guys could have definitely become famous.
    I still have one of your songs in my head from days ago!!!
    Ah, and I must remember to share a video with you in one of my upcoming posts that includes a glimpse of a VeeDub that has a huge spiral painted on the side. Ha!!

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      1. The GarageBand app is an easier platform than Logic Pro they say. I have 5% of working knowledge on GB presently. So considering and using Logic Pro as a more professional tool? Frightens me immensely. The full sound is layering on the Akai keyboard options. And a beautiful rich Guild acoustic guitar sound. Also those little electric guitar flick chords are layering inclusions too. So it kind of all marries well in synergy. I just get little keyboard harmonies to bounce off each other to create a weird background of weaving sound. Naive at present, but adds a little bit of interest to the ‘chug’ as I call it. My fave two are actually Old Man and Year One. They are personal songs to my life’s history. But, yes, I’m glad I stuck with it and seeing light at the end of the tunnel. Need the other guys now to drive it further. Cheers back.

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    2. Cheers Sheila. We played Shang-a-Lang in a gig set when we were a teenage band called Soft Ground. It used to go down a storm. I’m working on an Eddie rewrite of lyrics. New theme to the story with clearer words to sing. The first verse is very muddy sounding. And need a more dynamic first verse tune too. May use the ‘Tomorrow’s but a Heartbeat’ away dynamic and extend it.

      Looking forward to the VeeDub video inclusion. I love spotting a Dub on TV in some random way.

      And famous? Thank you for the sentiment, but….that dream went in my youth. Youth allows dreams of such nature. Now, with being frail? Too much pressure as The Selector sang. I know none of us know what may happen in our lives concerning the flip of the double sided positivity coin. But I know my songs’ outcomes need more than faerie dust sprinkled over them (as the Troggs argued about in the studio). Just nice to have a fun project to do in old age. Great reply as always Sheila. All the best.

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      1. Okay, Gray, the female comedian who just hit it big (Leanne Morgan) didn’t really start selling seats in good sized venues until recently and she’s 57. I never think were too old to hit it big.
        I must link Bubba’s video with that cool VeeDub in my Sunday post! Thank you for the back story about Shang-a-Lang.

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      2. Thank you Sheila. I love your positivity in all of your life’s undertakings. It shows a fantastic spirit for adventure and seeking knowledge. Actually, I am also positive in what I do currently because I love this stage of retirement. What it has given me time wise. I have come to realise that any success lay in this adventure itself. It’s like entering a parallel status in life with reluctance to try to re-enter the philosophy of what once was. This current place is now softer and more gentle and whether it goes into orbit or stays kicking around on ground level doesn’t matter.

        Simply enjoying all this recently found seeking of creating new songs holds a self promise to enjoy myself in its undertaking. The most important aspect is what it gives me emotionally really. This new found ‘other place’ I am now inhabiting is all that matters. If I was lucky enough to write a song that went into nutty dutty viral land…..yes, my family and friends would benefit greatly. So yes. That truly matters too. Everyone can dream that there can always be unlooked for and unexpected gifts from the Cosmos that come visit you with a huge smile. But if the Cosmos is, throughout life, been looking the other way? Yes, there have been times in my life where true frustration did exist. But, currently I know it doesn’t matter. The songs I have written, and am now writing, will always give me a smile that I can always call my own. Songs hopefully liked both myself and others who listen to them is quite a nice feeling.

        When I wrote the WP blog ‘So the story goes……’ Mantra those 10 plus years ago Sheila, I really did believe in its message to myself. And have stayed within this blog’s modest limits quite comfortably ever since. I love the ambience other bloggers bring to my site. That does matter greatly. Love the kindness of it all.

        And so the story goes. To where? No one knows. But borne from self promises. Not worn out wishes. 😊

        Cheers Sheila.

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    1. Thank you for this cookie. It’s so nice to have these good vibes from you. You know this as a fellow songwriter that you get into a period of strange inventions where your sense of musical adventure takes you somewhere new. I’m just a basic new age punk with an intentional attempt at getting a decent melody in the bag. This when playing in the 1970/80s past. Then over the decades? Little whimsy type stuff for brightening up the days. The Whistling Goldfish song because when swimming about they looked like they were whistling a tune. March of the Tinny Tin Soldiers when seeing Blackpool decorations all in rows along the streets. The Pink Hearts song, etc. Never any intention to be serious at the past levels again regarding music.

      I have been asked to join bands an awful lot when first moving up here to Wales 30 years ago. After a number of years, people stopped asking. They were usually a friend of a friend of a friend that knew of a band that needed a bass player to play song covers. I was never good enough to learn others’ songs. I haven’t the memory skills to remember the patterns due to my Aphantasia. My own songs are difficult enough! Even now it’s happening when linking memory to which new song is which. They all become jumbled in the collective.

      You write songs and do this lyrical subject study on a completely different level cookie. Far more pertinent observations on life and your experiences. Mine, over the days since leaving full on music, were throwaway ditty’s. Yours are longevity keepers. Lyrically poetic. Lyrically astute. I’m in awe of that style of song imagery. Like Paul McCartney’s ‘She’s leaving home’. Just a beautifully observational life story.

      This morning has been a dive into the past. I’m rewriting a song from 1978 called Mistaken Identity. Changing the key. So actually using a capo on the electric guitar! So I can get chord shapes to get at specific melody within the chord shapes. Never, ever used a capo on any song I’ve done. So it should be fun.

      Cheers and all the best cookie. Thank you for your kindness. Much appreciated.

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    1. I’ll say a big ‘Hi’ back at you. 😊 Hope you find leisure soon because that means you must be very busy. Yes. I’ve been a bit more active recently with songwriting. So can transfer to blog themes. It’s good to be realising songs and chilling out in their presence. Hope you are finding equal good vibes sustenance in your writing of awesome poetry. All the best Destiny. 🙏🏽

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      1. going a little on and off with the writing, Gray … nothing seems to be flowing the way I want it too🤦‍♀️🤭lol…
        and it’s year end here at schools so that’s another nightmare to wrap up …
        Lol, there were times we would wait for your shares … now we have to catch up…I’m glad.
        …and all the best your way too🤍

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      2. My daughter got a job last year as a teaching assistant in a junior school. She tells us how busy it can all get for you all. So I can understand. I taught her Sign Language when she was a teenager and she passed her exams up to Level II . Began working with DeafBlind adults. Then the children came along so was looking after them until her youngest is now in second year of schooling.

        Your writing inspiration will be just around the corner. I have the same conundrum with song writing. It’s good to watch and wait. Then ‘Bam’ ……you’re back on track.

        I truly appreciate your catching up, but please do not worry about it. Have time for yourself and relax after such a busy school term. I know what it is like trying to catch up here on WP. An impossible task with so many great bloggers to read. Of course I include myself as one of those great bloggers. 😆 Cheers Destiny. 🙏🏽

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