On finding an old blog from 2023 put into draft status……I reflected on the poem and suddenly needed to rewrite current thoughts. So basically, a total new blog.

Recently it has been a case of ‘What on Earth is going on with Time’. Five years ago, upon retirement, one single year passing by felt like it lasted for two years. Now? One year feels like six months. The days to weeks to months simply ‘Fly Bye’. Yes, that’s it! They Fly in and say Good-Bye so fast.

Once was a time before retirement that a certain VeeDub Bus, made in 1972, was used on a daily basis. The VeeDub Bus is officially known as a Volkswagen Type 2 Bay Crossover. Or, in other words…a Hippie Camper Van called Billie Cloud 9. Its past use? Getting to and from work on a daily basis and also an escape/bolt hole for leisure.

Now, in five years of retirement, it has hardly been used. In fact, over those five years, its use can probably be counted on the fingers of two hands. It had broken down massively and been repaired. But it still kept stuttering and cutting out on simple journeys. A change of carburettor was supposed to be the answer.

However, once again last year, on fitting the carburettor, it was found to need a huge repair job on rotting metalwork again. Possibly living near to the sea. Sea salty air? It was completed. Carburettor (twin port) sorted and bodywork rebuilt. So all tickety-boo? Nope. Looking out of the window this morning, it currently sits on the drive looking miserable. It performs at 12 miles to a gallon. And with massively expensive petrol being the norm currently it becomes a much considered thought process. And it has a fuel gauge that does not work. To make the fuel gauge readable? A huge intervention of getting at the fuel tank to fix a ‘sender’.

It is impossible to feel confidence in going out driving in such circumstances. Travelling along wondering if you are going to run out of petrol. And the cost of petrol being, as said, exorbitant too, you cannot travel far in a rural set up. The VeeDub uses Grade E5 petrol and the nearest garage that sells it requires a nine mile journey. Also. Welsh countryside, with lots of hill climbs, may even increase petrol consumption. Hence, reluctance to use the vehicle. So, this morning, the miserable situation of the VeeDub Bus has suddenly migrated to its owner.

Also. Lifestyle as an ‘introvert who likes to stay at home’ or ‘someone who found beautiful solace in isolation outdoors in the VeeDub’? Confusion exists as to why you are regularly asking the question nowadays as to ‘Why so many Negative Circumstances currently’? It is an emotion of huge impact and one that has chipped away at the brain over the past couple of years. It chips and chips away annoyingly and eventually brings you down. Both in physical and mental health. Crashing down actually. So much so that the time has arrived that requires a massive change regarding lifestyle.

When Father Time is moving too fast. There has to be an answer to slow it down. When life’s purpose is challenged, you simply have to change. In around four weeks, the reality of becoming a 70 year old in age status arrives.

Change! A break and withdrawal is the answer. The VeeDub Bus will be fixed. My wife has found someone who works on them. She is adamant that it will be sorted. Reflecting with my sensible logical brain this morning, a sudden realisation as to the VeeDub status dropped. ‘The past five years’ money input of thousands and thousands of pounds with costs of repair, insurance and buying never used extras (for going out to both record my music and relax) has been crazy. And what for!’

The stupidity of the situation has suddenly hit home. Embracing new holistic calm by focusing on richer worthwhile and wholesome experiences is the aim. The VeeDub up and running properly can provide a quest for finding calm again. Escape and dive deeply into re-finding the real nature of happiness.

Also. For the rest of the year, every effort will be for regular WordPress uploads to be put on hold. No attempting to do uploads of weekly useless write ups or my unfinished songs. Maybe a once every month or, even better, two monthly update of intent. May even delete all but my much visited seminal content. About 12 posts.

Life? Intent? It simply means finding one’s gentler soul again. This need for finding a new soulful simplicity may slow time down again.

On re-reading, I thought of the meaning of the Idlebird poem written a few years ago. There are a few lines within it. And yes! They self resonate.

On a daily basis….Dawdling here and there. Meandering to and fro. I have simply become ‘a song that is never sung’ recently. Never focused. Just mind bending random thoughts with subsequent confusion inherent.

Time cannot simply ‘pass by’ and no longer be enjoyed. As the poem says ‘No passer by is Pretty Fish…….’

This morning was a wake up call to new reality. Or as we British say as a colloquial idiom, ‘Give your head a wobble Summers.’

What is more important to embrace? Sister Sun? Or The Tin Moon?

To witness a running Idlebird

Is very rare you know

It waddles here

It dawdles there

It meanders to and fro.

You’ll only see an elder one

But Yes! They were once young

Their vibrant youth

Now a hidden truth

Within a song that is never sung.

No passer-by is Pretty Fish,

She often comes to say,

‘I’ve knocked your door

I do implore.

Ask me inside to stay’.

She’s traveled far in her bubble car

To bring a welcome tune

Shimmery fun

She’s Sister Sun

To Idlebird’s Tin Moon.